Take a Deep One, Baby. This May Be Your Only Chance.

Blogging mojo gone. Readers went down, if any left at all ~__~

The Reason?

The laptop's broken. For real. So now, i'm blogging from my college's huge ass Mac computers.

That with adding up with my ever increasing workload isn't helping at all. Everyone knows i love convenience. Especially that of technology.

No pictures in this post though.

I barely have time to sit down and take a breath anymore, things have been spinning and there's no sign of it ever stopping anytime soon. Not that i'm complaining, mind you. I really don't mind. But sometimes yea, i do whine of how tired i am and being constantly on-the-go is contributing to my lack of sleep, but i'd NEVER really wish that my life would slow down.

Yes, being just a college student would be fun, and much less stressful, just going about happy and partying and hanging out, but i know i'll never be satisfied just being a college student.

I remember the days where i did nothing. When i went out shopping, getting the afternoon dose of vodka, having a shisha then partying every single damn day. That was fun. But you can only do nothing for so long.

Life goes on, you either catch up, or you lose out.

I go all out for things i wanna do, dreams i wanna reach. Because it's just not good enough just doing what you can and what you feel like. Chasing your dreams involves going beyond what you can do, pushing yourself past that borderline between not doing and doing, every single time. Life is not gonna just hand you what you want, you have to want it so badly to work your ass off for it. Otherwise, you don't deserve it. Leave it for someone else who wants it more badly than you do. Don't waste it.

I push myself past that borderline. It's not easy but once you got the hang of identifying the line, your goals are a little clearer. Sometimes i wanna stop and break down. Cause sometimes things just get too much, juggling between friends, college, assignments and building my career. But i suck it up, life doesn't slow down and wait for you just being you're tired. I understand that.

I'm standing on the edge right now, but trust me, the view is breath taking from here.

:)

And i can never be more grateful than i am right now, for the opportunities that was presented to me, for the friends that i have to be my backbone, for the people in my life that brought me here, knowing i'll never let them down, and for those who stayed around to remind where i came from and how far i've made it.

kisses.

Broadwalk Modeling Finale

Being young sometimes has it's perks.
But sometimes it makes me feel inferior to others.
Wednesday night was the finale of the Broadwalk Modeling online pageant and being the youngest there, just like i am in the FHM Girl Next Door, does sometimes make me feel like i'm not up to par. I mean, being older, in your near twenties, definitely you're labeled hotter naturally. They have more muscle tone and a better figure overall when i'm only at a stage where i'm losing my baby fats ~__~


I always thought that age isn't a barrier in any way, not in love or talent. But at some point, it's a factor especially when it comes to anything regarding looks. You can definitely tell the difference between a 25 year old and someone as young as me.

But i keep telling myself that i'm just as much of a competition as anyone else. I try to be as confident as i can.


But that night, i didn't do as great. I already knew i wouldn't win. With the pageant being completely voting based, it has it's flaws. It was not properly judged based on their model potential. Anyone can join basically, as long as you have friends. It was more of a popularity contest that focus alot on campaigning. Not so much of a model search. But i'm sure they have their reasons why it was made so.

During the final voting stage, i was busy modeling for FHM for 2 weeks. Campaigning was not my priority, so i knew my chances of winning was slim. But hey, at least i tried, right?
:)


I'm glad and very appreciative that my friends came over (even though you guys were late!) LOL. I admit, i need people around me, sometimes i can't do it alone. I was on the verge of breaking down, knowing that my friends weren't there yet. I'm not usually like this. I don't get nervous, no one has ever seen me nervous in a very very long time. Confidence is what i've been known to have and own.

I guess that night just proved to me that sometimes, i'm only human.

It was definitely a chaotic night to remember. It was my first model search/pageant and it was a great experience. Terry from Broadwalk Modeling was a great help in preparing us for the industry and gave us a glimpse of what is required of us. I'm definitely looking forward to working with them in future. It was nice meeting the girls and it was great knowing that i have people who support me and back me up, in person, in twitter, text messages, phone calls and facebook.

Ahhh, the world of online social networking.

That night, i brought the boyf, Azhar, Suzuki, and Kent along. The rest of the group was supposed to be there but they couldn't make it last minute but it was alright :) i'm just glad for the support the past few months. Aurea and Eshia texted me saying how proud they were (it's just a small thing ~__~ ). Nick Kee was there. And suprisingly the FHM team was there too to give support. Miss Julia, Tim.

It was a great night knowing that you have people to back you up no matter what.
Even for things as small as this.

Well like i said, i didn't win.

But i did bag for Miss Personality ;)

I heart you, every single goddamn one of you.

kisses.

How To Rock Your Way To New York

Here's a step to step guide ,guys, how to be a rock star and make your way to New York.
For real!

1. Don on your most rock star material outfit (So this season, think studs, metals, leather and black)
2. Remember the smoky eye, waterproof preferably. You don't want sweat while you're rocking out to ruin it!
3. Rock Star BIG hair!
4. Tape a video/Snap a photo of yourself with screming "Rock Me!". Not literally though.
5. Get on your PC/laptop/iPhone.

P.S.: Guitar is optional.

Owh owh owh!
Don't forget to just spritz a little bit of Anna Sui's new rocking fragrance, "Rock Me".
The right scent makes all the difference in attitude, ya know?

My entry. Agyness wins hands down.

It's just so simple guys.
Once you've taken a video (or snapped a photo for all you lazy bunch) of yourself with that "Rock Me" attitude, make sure you upload it to any video (or photo) sharing website with the tag #rockme or rockme. Make it findable by search engines so that the Admin people can find you (they have to be able to find you to qualify). Or better yet, upload them to their facebook page here.
Guaranteed entry! And you get to check out your competitors.

Did i mention
Grand prize winners win a trip for two (2) to New York City to watch the Anna Sui 2010 Fashion Show! Plus shopping money!

But even if you're not the grand prize winner there will also be three (3) other prizes to be won! Or you can just murder the grand prize winner and take her prize.
Teehee ;)
As long as i get a share of it, since i gave the idea.

More details here at their facebook page!



So readers, if you're from Hong Kong, South Korea, Singapore, Malaysia!!! or Taiwan, make sure you upload your video/photo before the 7th of December 2009.
Other countries, too bad.

One thing though, don't copy me!
Mine ain't original anyway.

But at least i got to be a Rock Star for 30 minutes while i took the picture!

kisses.

When Love is All You Need

So i'm being cheesy, sue me.
When you're in love, that's how you are. You wanna watch every possible romance movie out there, you chase every fantasy fairytale and dream of that perfect love story complete with 3 kids and a huge white house.

Love makes you crazy, we all know that.

But knowing that has never stopped any of us from falling in love, has it?
Love has made me crazier than i've ever been. Both the good sort of crazy and the bad.


I think i'm going to get people so sick from talking so much about the boyfriend.

The boy was there before Perfectionista started, before the modelling started and before the crazy partying and events started. He loved me when there was nothing much about me to love, when i was that 16 year old smart ass with dreams impossible to reach. Well, i'm still that smart ass and the dreams are now not so impossible, eh?

:)

It's funny we started out as childhood kids and then pulled together by something called faith, National Service and Form 6.
He has always told me he hated National Service and Form 6, but he never regretted it. Cause without them, he wouldn't have met me. Attending National Service was one choice that changed his life. I guess life is all about the decisions we make. One decision can make your life go into a whole different direction.


Back to the topic, the past 2 years and 3 months have been a dream (the first year was more like a nightmare though).Things were and never will be smooth for us but i'm grateful for all that he has brought to my life, for all that he has taught me and for all the times he pulled through with me when he could have left. I've changed from who i was 2 years ago, just like everyone did. And i credit it partially to him. Being older, he knew just a LITTLE more (though i'm still the matured one in the relationship). Getting so comfortable with him entirely has made me more comfortable with myself and in my own skin. That meant not being afraid to show who i am, for real and getting out of my shell. He changed me in ways i've never imagined.
I'm a little louder, and little crazier and so much more in love.

I've never given myself so much to a man as much as i gave to him and up till now, i've never regretted it. We've moved on from our past and living a whole new life together. Sure, we've dreamt of living together, moving in, getting married, kids and all that growing up together stuff, but right now, i'm perfectly happy just being with him.

Can't help falling in love with you, boy.

kisses.

Living In Sin Is The New Thing

To quote Britney Spears.
I have a sudden weird addiction to Miley Cyrus's Party in the USA. ~__~ I'm not some tween fan though. It's just catchy, okay? And she has boobs now. Like my current boobs obsession, Leah Dizon.

I've been a lousy blogger, i admit, deserved to be punished.
I've not updated in a week even though my finals ended last Friday. But but but, in my defence, i've been busy. After exams i headed to watch the Time Traveler's Wife with the boyf, Aurea and Lionel before heading for a post-finals drinking session with college mates.

We just find every excuse to celebrate ~__~ like our pre-halloween, pre-exams boozing.

The day after i took my time to catch up on sleep and ballet and mamak-ed with Aurea and Lionel. Crashed at the boyf's place.
Sunday was very well spent, shopping at Pavilion and KLCC and finally caught Inglorious Basterds.
My verdict? Definitely expect not your usual weekend movie. And hot guys always win in the end. Yay Brad Pitt!
Teehee :)

I think i ran up the credit card bill again within the week my dad is in Japan. I demanded for bags from Issey Miyake, which i doubt i'm getting anyway, so i might as well spend here. It's so nice to just finally not worry of the possibility of my failing out of college and getting kicked out again for doing 'bad' in exams. Like a 'B', for example.
Sigh.

I always hated being too free. I never hated being busy, but i guess now's the time to finally finish all my projects and start planning where my life is heading again. The funny thing is, as much as i don't like not knowing what's going to happen, i take risks, i enjoy the adrenaline of it.

More soon.

kisses.

Living Life.

One thing i learn in my 18 years, 2 months and 26 days is that success isn't handed to you.
Unless you're born with a silver spoon in your mouth or is an heir/heiress living somewhere on the Upper East Side of Manhattan, opportunities to make it big, isn't going to either.

Don't wait for opportunities, they may never come. Create them.

No one is gonna come up to you one day while you're slacking and say "Here's your opportunity and your success, take it". And opportunity is not going to go door to door searching for the next big thing. Poor opportunity, would have to go search for 6 billion people there is on this planet.


I certainly did not reach this point in my life just slacking every day, not making a move or having a purpose in my life. Although i still don't consider myself successful in my terms, but i think that i came a long way since my days as a high school teen just rebelling and dreaming of a break. I certainly work for it. Pushing myself to the limit in every single way, taking in new experiences and trying just about everything in the field. It definitely was tiring, but it paid off. My life isn't going to go anywhere if i just go about my mundane routine everyday without making my ass move.

No one handed me opportunities. My family isn't even supportive of the field that i want to get into. I went out there, i carved my own path and i created my own opportunities.

Even if that means i have to fork out money for cab fees.

I take full responsibility for both my failures and my success.
Nowadays, opportunities are advertised so much that half of the job's already been done for you. All you have to do is just take that risk and give it the best you got. If you're not going to take risks, the chances of you being successful is nil.

I'm a believer in taking risks, those that are worth it, and living my life to the fullest.

And don't let people put you down saying that your dreams are too big, it's gonna be nearly impossible. Because i rather be a dreamer that fails occasionally than a realist who will never succeed.

And don't let anyone take credit for your own efforts.

kisses.

What's It Like Working for 12 Hours?

For starters, it kills you. But it's effin fun.
At least my job is.
Typical photo shoots take around 2-4 hours plus minus hair and make up and touch up time. But seeing that this is for FHM, 12 hours it is. It will be my finals next week, you'd think that i'd be locked up studying at home. Lol. I'm still out, i'm a social creature, not one to stay at home all day and rot like a certain lifeless sister i know (I'll let you guess).
;)

To make me seem 'smarter', please know that i did substitute my event time with my notes. Which means, i skipped Recharge at Blanc Le Club ( i know, right!) and All American Rejects as well as Halloween party at Zouk. Sigh, being out of the scene is no fun at all. It's so not me to skip events. Plus, i haven't been hanging out with Jason, Jeremy and all lately and i kinda miss them.

This Is It movie premiere :)

The Time Traveler's Wife is out and i remember raving about it so much to my friends how i HAVE to be at the premiere. Well, i'm stuck with exams so movies will have to wait for now.
Man, i can't wait for finals to be over. Semester break will be the time of my life, catching up with friends and acting crazy and free all over again.




I was nominated for UNIQUE blog of the month and i'm not even done with my interview questions yet.
~__~

I'm DYING to shop!

kisses.